ABDC Season 8: Judging the Judges
Saturday, August 08, 2015 |
| Picture Courtesy of Frankie J. Grande's Instagram |
Maybe I'm being too hard on them. But when the bar has been raised that high, anything less just cheapens the competition. My main gripe with the line-up in general is the lack of constructive criticism, 'constructive' being the operative term. Yes, they 'critique' the performances. But any Joe round the corner can say, "Oh that was bad." That counts as a form of 'critique'. What I want is a technical evaluation of the dancing, the routines, or a take on their creative artistry. Not just a lame 'Oh that was wicked' or 'man, ya'll did some sick shit'. You are a judge on a dance competition, and that kind of assessment doesn't cut it.
If you think something was 'slick', articulate why and what. Was it the timing of the downrock? The distribution and use of space in the routine? If you "ain't feelin' it", maybe express what about it was off. Poorly-executed flips? Maybe they've been reusing their finger tutting? Say it. The onus lies on judges to call out these instances. If you don't, then I will call YOU out on a sub-par run.
Of the three, the biggest buffoon is T-Pain, no disrespect to his record-producing chops or his double Grammy win. But the last time I checked, he doesn't have the deets 'dancer' or 'choreographer' on his credentials. And it shows. Even when he makes an attempt to narrow in on specific movements, his paltry dance jargon compels him to say things like "that was a performance, y'all make me feel good, y'all makin' it work". I suppose in a bid to conceal his limited vocabulary, he tries to play king of the quotes. From "I may have peed a little bit" in response to Super Cr3w in Week One, to raving about Kinjaz with "cleanliness is next to me likiness", some of which are real hoots. But if I wanted wise-cracks, I would watch The Simpsons. He did pick up on Quest Crew's Jolee having a minor hand stand fail the week though.
Teyana tries, but though she is less annoying than T-Pain, she still comes up short. She said Quest was the "epitome of teamwork", but hey, it's America's Best Dance CREW. There's teamwork left, right and centre. She does pick up on the more prominent moves, like pointing out Elektrolyte's 'Human Jump-rope' in Week One and I'm always welcoming towards fellow Kinjaz groupies. If there's one thing I like, it's that she's not afraid to defend her position. When she disagrees with another judge's remarks, she stands firm by her decision. Unlike T-Pain, who at first thought the Elektrolytes lacked "energy", but bit back his words a little when confronted by Teyana. But who can blame T-Pain? Dude probably can't tell the hip from hop.
Next to the other two, Frankie Grande seems like a bona fide critic. True, he is problematic in the same vein as I outlined in the beginning, but he does make an effort to say something beyond drab fillers. His comment about I.aM.mE playing on the birthday party theme with bed-jumping, balloons and moves that resembled the game 'Twister' was a well observed one. Last week he exalted Neguin for being the most "emotionally-connected break-dancer" he had ever seen, which was rather accurate. He looks at the quality of the lifting, the set, the rhythmic harmony between dancers, and I'm guessing his Broadway background helped hone his eye. At least he's an improvement from the others.
You know who else had a minor improvement? A MINOR one? The host. But Jason Dundas is still no Mario Lopez.
Well, until next week, we'll see if the content and delivery of the judges' reviews makes any progress.
-Jac
You know who else had a minor improvement? A MINOR one? The host. But Jason Dundas is still no Mario Lopez.
Well, until next week, we'll see if the content and delivery of the judges' reviews makes any progress.
-Jac
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